Ask The Dad

Martini Thursday turned into Hangover Friday, so I think I'll just answer an email today.

Dear The Dad,

After almost 10 years here at home rapidly losing brain cells, finances require that I need to re-enter the workforce at least part-time in the fall when my 6-year old starts 1st grade. I, like you, have an "ology" degree, which is pretty much useless, topped off by a Master's Degree that is so embarassingly stupid I won't even name it.

My question is this: do you have any suggestions for employment? I'm a great encourager, all the way back to, "Great, you made a poop-poop!" to "Yes, I love that Lego creation" (for the 40th time when each new piece is added), to standing on the sidelines at the soccer/basketball game and cheering like an idiot when they make a goal for the wrong team. Do you think anyone would consider hiring a pushing-40 overweight mother of two as a cheerleader? I'm certainly not sharp enough for much else at this point.

mommy24x7

Dear mommy24x7,

I'm sorry, but you seem to be confused about how this feature works. You see, you are supposed to ask a simple straight-forward question, then I am supposed to come up with a witty response. Like this:

Dear The Dad,

After almost 10 years here at home rapidly losing brain cells, finances require that I need to re-enter the workforce. Do you have any suggestions for employment?

Catching your pearls of wisdom, mommy24x7

Dear mommy24x7,

If you've been a stay-at-home mom for 10 years, you are probably good for only one thing: encouraging. Starting with "Great, you made a poop-poop!" to "Yes, I love that Lego creation" (for the 40th time when each new piece is added), to standing on the sidelines at the soccer/basketball game and cheering like an idiot when they make a goal for the wrong team, you can surely encourage with the best of them. Have you considered becoming a pushing-40, overweight cheerleader?

Hope this helps,

The Dad

You see? That way we all come out looking good. Especially when the pounding in my head is louder than the pounding of the twins on the lid to their daytime box.

Got a simple, straight-forward question for The Dad? Email me.

Email The Dad

Comments

[You can call me, 'Sir']

You keep them in a box during the day?

[Laura]

"The lid to their daytime box"!! I love it. I love how you bring old posts back like that. There's a literary term for that I think, but my synapses aren't firing so well today. It would be "full circle" if you were doing a standup routine.

Mommy24x7 - Maybe you could be a professional organizer, like the people below? See here:

http://www.sandenelson.com/home.html

http://www.cleartheclutter.com.au/Services_Offered.html

[mommy24x7]

O.k, o.k, so I talk way too much. So sorry to offend The Dad. Maybe I should reconsider the cheerleader thing and be a "professional blogger" instead. Does it pay well?

[Tammy from Twinstuff]

It sounds like you need another Martini today. It's nothing like a little hair of the dog to get you through a hangover. Besides, you need to drink some for me because my twins are turning two tomorrow. :)

[The Dad]

Professional blogger pays big time. Not so much with money, but with prestige. Lots and lots of prestige with the blogging.

[fourznuff]

Here is a question for you...Does prestige pay the bills?