I'd Have Watched It Twice If I'd Had Double My Writing Time

I would have had a post written for today, but I spent all of the 8 minutes and 14 seconds of writing time I've had since Monday watching this.

glumbert.com - Louis CK hates his children

Thanks Kate.

Comments

[Rachel]

Ooops. I'll have to try to watch it again later when my kids aren't right here! Can't wait!

[Jennifer]

Yeah, I just had to hit the pause button when my tot walked in, but I'll be watching it later! I LOVE this guy (Louis CK, that is). His show on HBO was hysterically funny and I'm still bummed that it was cancelled.

Have fun at 6 Flags, Dad. Hope the Gmama is still around to help you chase those twins around the park. Best of luck to ya.

[Kate]

I figured if there was anyone else who thought calling a four year old a douchebag was hilarioius, it would be you!

[Chip]

Man....Haven't we all just been there? It would be just so much easier sometimes if we could just treat the kids like our adult friends.

[jon deal]

Oh my. I giggled so much I wet myself.

We have 4 mostly delightful children, but I have felt what he's talking oh, I don't know... every day? :-]

[Lisa in Seattle]

My five-year-old walked in, and I paused it. She said she wanted to watch it. I said, "No, it's just for grown-ups." She said, "I don't care--I won't be bored." We argued about it for a minute, then I had a flash of brilliance. "It's SCARY, honey. It's REALLY REALLY SCARY." She was out of here like a bat out of hell. Don't think I won't run that one into the ground...

[amy]

Crying-funny, that guy is. It was great! Thanks for sharing.

[Kel]

That was so funny I actually stopped breathing while watching it. Highlight of my week.

[cindy]

My mother in law & I cried damn hard watching this one.She has the same sense of joy at un-"p.c." humor & this is superb. Did you read the negative comments about it on the the actual glumbert.com site? my god, people think he's actually saying this stuff to his kids (rather than that bubble over our heads which is saying what we REALLY want to say). I knew there would be lots of folks out there who give him hell for it. I think my mom is one of them.
And I'm pretty sure that he wrote that last part about his daughter's, um, joy in herself by watching MY daughter. I wonder if his daughter stuck a cheez-it inside, offered it to him & said "want it"?

[Angela]

Thank you so much for sharing, tears of laughter were rolling down my face. I've emailed it to my husband who also has a twisted sense of humor.

[chelle1464]

Oh, Cindy... no she didn't... Yeah, we had a lot of discussions about my niece humping the ground and getting all sweaty with the effort. Ummmm.... finally I think I remember hearing my sister say, "A, if you're going to do that, you need to do it in your room. Remember? That's private." My niece was maybe 4-5... but she never, ever offered herself as a dip bowl. Yes, kids are certainly disgusting. And to be honest, I'm still disgusting, I just don't let anybody catch me at it.

[cindy]

Yes, Chelle, she most certainly did. The look on my husband's face told me that he would never ever be able to eat food offered by her. She's 7 today & we still bring this one up for the record book of disgustingness. I, like you, hide my disgusting behavior. Girls...and we have 3 of them like The Dad.

[lynn]

Wow, Cindy (and LD and others). Did you catch this recent thread at One Good Thing? Check it out:
http://buggydoo.blogspot.com/2007/06/contest-humiliating-moments-in.html
and http://buggydoo.blogspot.com/2007/07/contest-got-out-of-control.html

[Eve]

By the time he got to, " She has no defensive skills- just smiling up at me..." I had totally lost my shit.

Thanks for the giggles, The Dad.

[Amy]

So good to have someone saying this stuff. I was losing it over the friend who won't tie his fucking shoe so everyone can go.

I wasn't laughing about the masturbation part though. One day she is going to hear about that and hate him. Kids deserve privacy too, even if at 4 they don't give a shit about it. Many comedians do have a way of telling everyone's most embarrassing stories, because let's face it, they're assholes, but man, I'd kill anyone in my family who told mine on television.

[Jena]

I saw this on tv a few ..weeks(?) ago. Laughed so hard I cried. I have no kids but used to babysit for some of the most ill-mannered children on the planet. For the record, those thoughts go through the babysitters minds too. The best way to get 'em back in line was to threaten to tell the parents EVERYTHING. There's a book by Anne Lamot called "Operating Instructions" in the same vein, less cursing, just as funny.

[loren]

I particularly like the "I would RUIN her face with one punch." That was awesome! Seriously, I've thought of punting a child or two or three out of a window.

OMG, almost forgot about the shoes thing. That was fricking hilarious - so much like our house! We get two with shoes on, then as the third is getting hers on, the first one takes hers off - errrgggg! (That's usually the point that I want to punt them...)

Thanks. Thanks. Thanks.

[Cassie]

OMG!!! I just "spit" Diet Coke out my nose.