And Did You Know That Some Dads Call Their Children Homeschooled?

"Did you know that some boys call their wieners balls?"

"Oh honey, balls aren't wieners. Balls are... balls."

I didn't hear the rest of their conversation. I was too busy searching for a size 6X nun's habit on eBay.

Comments

[Anita]

Man, I never know exactly how to handle stuff like that. WWJCD (what would June Cleaver do)?

My youngest has taken a fancy to mentioning her "boobies" in public at every (awkward) opportunity. It probably doesn't help that I snicker every time she does it...

[amy]

priceless!

[lilfootsmommy]

While you're checking on ebay, can you see if they have two? I'm sure you and my hubbie graduated top honors from the same school of thinking!!! heehee

[LiteralDan]

This sounds like a conversation between me and my son, sent magically from the future. I base this on the way he absorbs everything around him, inaccurately/incompletely processes it, then swears up down and sideways that he is the sole possessor of the truth regarding the subject.

I eagerly await these kinds of touchy conversations with a fascinated dread.

[Sherry]

I just had to explain this to my 8yo son the other day.

[Lar]

Oh, my husband will love this story. He freaked out yesterday when I told him our 9-year-old was at a boy classmate's house working on a science project: "Don't you know what boys are like?!"

Yeah, but they don't get that way until they're at least 10, right?

[Kim]

My favorite part is when I ask my 6yo where he hears this stuff, he ALWAYS answers from his 9yo sister. Thanks for sharing big sis!

[Catizhere]

HA!! The other night Maggie (5) was showing Daddy her "boobie-dance" Mostly a little hip shaking, but then she pulled her shirt up to her chin & shook her shoulders.

Once he re-gained consciousness, he said to me, "Straight to the nunnery with her!"

[Alexis]

Be grateful that Kathryn doesn't have an older brother to show her these "ball things" up-close, I mean really close. Then again, someone recently asked me where do I see my daughter (4 1/2) at 15 and I said either pregnant or on a stripper pole. I think they teach each other really valuable body info that only is revealed in front of other parents. And I wonder why they don't have playdates...

[Nicole]

I think I am already overly sensitive to trying to keep things clinical and practical. Recently Connery asked me, "What do you call those things that men have?" and I got rather cross with him and told him that he knew perfectly well that it was called a penis. He looked very confused and said, "No, I mean those little beards that men have on their chins! What do you call those?"

Just call me gutter-mom.

[Burgh Baby]

Next time a conversation like this comes up, could you please video tape it? I need to study up on what works and what doesn't work before the Toddler figures out how to break out of the basement. I've got a few years, but I want to be ready just in case the shackles don't work.

[Meg]

That's hilarious! What in the world are kids talking about in school these days?

[loren]

Nicole - that is SO me! I would be the one thinking of all the dirty things while the girls are talking about balls - the playground kind.

[Holly]

Hilarious, you need to write that down so you'll remember it later...

[The Godfather]

It's that crazy New Jersey influence! You need to bring those girls back to Texas!

[The Godfather]

You said "THEIR conversation." Who was talking to Kathryn?

[The Mom]

Hello? The Godfather? Hello? She does have a mother. Remember that woman you took to prom? I occasionally speak to my daughter as well. I do make it home most nights.

[The Godfather]

The Mom,
I figured it was probably you but I just wanted to make sure it wasn't some little hormone machine in her carpool or something. Sorry, just being a little over-protective!

The Godfather

[cowx10]

conversation at home between SM and her two sons, in the bathroom --
"hey mom, what's this ball thing under my penis"
"your ball....isn't there two?"
"is there supposed to be?"
"i dunno"
turn to older brother, who reaches hands down britches, "yeah, there's two"
fast forward, two weeks later, number two son runs out of the house to mom (out talking with neighbor), "mom, there's two! i have TWO balls now!!"

i'm a girl, what do i know about balls?

[Danielle-lee]

Oh, that's great! I love it!

[Cassie]

OMG. I have 2 boys. I guess I need to educate myself a bit more on this "ball thing".

[Renata]

I just read this post yesterday, and thought to myself, we'd done such a good job teaching our kids the proper names for penis and testes.

Then today Liam giggled when I used the word "nuts" in exasperation. He then told me "That's what some boys call their wieners. Hee hee."

[Childsplayx2]

Having boy/girl twins means there are lots of questions about each other's private parts. My (very conservative) wife is hating me for teaching them the "correct" words. So now we get to hear things like "TheMonk has a penis and I have a vagina!" All of the time. And, yes, I get a dirty glare from the wife.