Dear Kathryn,
You were a day-and-a-half old when your mother woke me to tell me you were choking. It was sometime around 3 AM and you, your mom, and I were all sharing the same hospital room. Never in my life before or since have I moved as fast as I did then. You were lying there, still, quiet when I jumped up from my cot and wrapped my hands around you, not knowing what to do but knowing that picking you up was probably a good start. And you wailed. And that was how I interrupted the first full hour of sleep I had had since you were born.
You weren't choking at all, of course. You were sleeping. The word your mom had said was "joking", not "choking," and to hear her tell it, she had said it a good fifteen minutes before I jumped up and made you cry so pitifully. It seems your mom had woken up in some discomfort from her surgery and had asked me for a cup of water, prompting me to stand up from my cot, walk to her bed, and hand her my pillow. As I shuffled back to my cot, she asked if I were joking.
Fifteen minutes later my sleep-deprived brain processed that last word. With about 85% accuracy.
Since that day, I've tried to maintain that same 85% success rate in my raising of you, my first child. Certainly some days have been better and some days have been worse, but all-in-all, I feel that I have earned a solid B on any fathering report card I might be issued.
And now today, Kathryn, you are seven years old. So far the biggest change is in your timeline for the future. For the past year, seven was everything to you. At mealtimes you'd regale us with tales of your future seven-year-old accomplishments, and now that you are there, you have already begun the monumental task of shifting those feats up one more year. Like when you're eight, you'll read that book we bought you. Or you'll swim the width of the pool. Or you'll be famous. And then we will all celebrate by jumping in our rocket-powered hovercrafts and jaunting over to your favorite restaurant where the food is cooked entirely by robots.
But seven is still really exciting to you, and when we were driving the other day, in one of those rare moments when the twins were quiet and we could speak to each other, you told me that you thought Kate or Katy might be a good name for a seven-year-old. You said it hesitatingly, nervous how I might take it, as in the past I have expressed a general dislike of diminutive nicknames. But you were about to turn seven, a wonderfully delightful seven at that, and I was determined to not fall below the 85% mark on this occasion, so I said that you could certainly call yourself anything you wished, because it was your name and you were the boss of you.
Then I asked if you thought it would be okay if I still called you Kathryn, because calling you that made me happy. For a long time you were quiet, and when you spoke, you sounded two years younger. "Daddy," you said, "I really like it when you call me Little Bear."
So Happy Birthday, Little Bear. May your next seven years be at least as good as 85% of your last seven.
Love, Daddy
Eighty-five percent!?!? Sheesh, I think I'm averaging a D-minus these days. Happy Birthday to your Little Bear!
Posted by: sasha | July 28, 2007 at 12:34 AM
Beautiful. Just beautiful. And a very happy 7th birthday to Kathryn/Katy/Little Bear!
Posted by: Meredith | July 28, 2007 at 12:37 AM
what a wonderful gift to K -- this letter so filled with love. I hope that her birthday is good for you all.
Posted by: Susannah | July 28, 2007 at 07:07 AM
Happy Birthday Kathryn from a fellow Kathryn! (I really do prefer Kate these days..)
Posted by: Kate | July 28, 2007 at 08:25 AM
Now I am all teary-eyed as I send my love and birthday wishes to The Rose. And to The Dad and The Mom - a bah humbug on the "solid B"!
Posted by: The Gmama | July 28, 2007 at 08:39 AM
85% is the new 100. Happy B-Day!
Posted by: Tammy | July 28, 2007 at 09:52 AM
OMG, I'm all choked up! The Dad went and got all sensitivo on us.
Something tells me that Kathryn would give her Dad an A+ ...
Posted by: Jennifer | July 28, 2007 at 09:56 AM
Happy Birthday, Kathryn. You really are my favorite 7-year-old. xoxo.
Posted by: EOMama | July 28, 2007 at 09:56 AM
What a wonderful gift for your daughter to read this someday!
Happy birthday Little Bear.
Posted by: Steph P | July 28, 2007 at 10:17 AM
Happy Birthday Little Bear! Did you tell Daddy what kind of car you want??
Posted by: heidi | July 28, 2007 at 10:38 AM
Happy Birthday, Kathryn!
Posted by: Dog Mom | July 28, 2007 at 10:39 AM
Sniffle....
Happy Birthday Little Bear!
Posted by: Anne Prince | July 28, 2007 at 11:49 AM
Today is also my baby's birthday. But she is turning 26. And she will be a mama herself in about 7 weeks. Talk about your world changing. Happy Birthday Kate, Katy, Kathryn, Little Bear!
Posted by: Debbeeanne | July 28, 2007 at 12:50 PM
Awww!
Don't make the Preggosaurus cry! That was so sweet!
Happy 7th anniversary on becoming a father.
Posted by: Hatchet | July 28, 2007 at 05:44 PM
I know you are a "man's man" and a tough guy...but you just melted my heart with this one.
happy birthday to your favorite 7 year old!
Posted by: Amber | July 28, 2007 at 09:02 PM
Happy Birthday! It's my birthday today too....although I'm quite a bit older than 7.
Posted by: Jodi | July 28, 2007 at 10:27 PM
Happy Birthday to Little Bear!
Posted by: Darren | July 29, 2007 at 12:52 AM
No fair making me cry before I've even gotten to my second cup of coffee!
Posted by: django's mommy | July 29, 2007 at 07:28 AM
now that was beautiful, so sweet. happy birthday Kathryn.
Posted by: chocs | July 29, 2007 at 04:30 PM
That was just so sweet! Happy birthday Kathryn.
Posted by: SusanR | July 29, 2007 at 07:25 PM
Oh, beautiful.
Happy birthday to your darling big girl, whatever she wants to be called!
Posted by: whymommy | July 29, 2007 at 11:08 PM
Wonderful, wonderful! Happy birthday, Kathryn. And I don't think you need to wait until you're eight to be famous. All of us who read your daddy's blog think you're famous already.
Posted by: Holly | July 30, 2007 at 12:37 PM
I'm a Kathryn too, although my nickname was Katie as a young child. When I was about 7 or 8, I wanted to change it a little bit too. Everyone in my family had a name ending in Y (Mommy, Daddy, etc) and I hated being different so I asked my dad if I could change to Katy. He let me do it, but he still writes Kathryn or Katie on my cards! ;) Happy Birthday to your Kathryn! :)
Posted by: K | July 30, 2007 at 06:38 PM
the dad, i love your blog and when i need a good chuckle, i know i can come here. but now i have tears streaming down my face and i'm all emotional after reading your wonderful letter to your daughter. so sweet! you're a great daddy.
Posted by: Lori | July 31, 2007 at 02:53 PM
That was beautifully written.
Happy Birthday (belated).
PS...I also have a seven year old and a set of twins, 4 year olds.
Posted by: WoodhouseFamily5 | August 14, 2007 at 11:17 PM