And She Hits Like a Girl

Seven Things I Learned About My Wife While on Vacation

1. She's an Aquarius.
2. She can, when time allows, speak in complete sentences.
3. She still fits in the two piece bathing suit she bought 14 years and 3 kids ago.
4. She still owns the two piece bathing suit she bought 14 years and 3 kids ago.
5. Recently, something she did at work won some kind of award. (This one was kind of confusing.)
6. Both people and mosquitos prefer her company to mine.
7. After a day in the sun, her skin glows deep olive and tastes like sugar cane.

Comments

[Laura]

She still fits in the two piece bathingsuit she bought 14 years and 3 kids ago?? You are one lucky guy The Dad. Hey - The Mom - how do you do it?

I have no kids and can't fit into a bathing suit I bought 3 years ago.

Sounds like you guys did a lot of reconnecting. That is fantastic.

[The Mom]

Honey, I'm a Sagittarius, not an Aquarius.

[Marge]

Re #7: excuse me, I'm at WORK. This is way too distracting.

[Brian]

Whatever.

[LiteralDan]

That all sounds great, but it's just too bad that time (and kids) won't allow her to speak in complete sentences again for a long time.

[Anne Prince]

#7 - smooth Dad, very smooth

[Heidi #2 but whose counting...]

I'm an aquarius!! (waving hand enthusiastically, perhaps because of no. 7)

[Heidi #2 but whose counting...]

But in fairness to the mom I should add there is no way i h**l I can get into my before kids suit...

[heidi]

I HAVE the 2 pc. bathing suit, but can only get into it with alot of crisco.
As an aside... am I Heidi #1 or Heidi #3???

[John]

Really, why were you tasting her? Did some drops of Belikin escape and you just couldn't bear to lose any? You are fixed, right? We're not going to be seeing Looky Daddy IV - VI: The Sequence Continues, are we?

[Danielle-Lee]

Aww, how sweet are you? Seriously, you should go on vacation more often, if you really forget what her skin tastes like!!!

[Joy]

I see that John and I have been thinking (and worrying) along the same lines, although I admit I had to google "Belikan."

[sezhoo]

oh now, come on Joy and John. They were on vacation. I'd be disappointed if there wasn't some tasting going on. jeesh.

[John]

It's just because I don't even remember what the word vacation means. The last time I left the Northeast without children was May of 2000 - and that was all the way to DC.

[Kate]

I like #7.. maybe because it sounds like something my husband would say. Sweet, sensual, salacious..

[Brian]

Let me assure the worried populace that children numbers 4 through infinity are not a physical possibility.

[Chookooloonks]

#7 is the sexiest thing I've ever heard -- and I'm from a country that grows sugar cane, so I know.

My husband is pretty good with the lines as well, but you? You should teach a course.

[John]

LD, there have been isolated case reports of spontaneous recanaliztation of the vas. Just the thought sometimes makes me wake suddenly with chills in the wee small hours of the morning.

[Scylla]

Simply a lovely list.

[Joy]

That's a relief, Brian. I mean I enjoy watching your tortured life from afar, but there are limits. Oh and John's not serious, is he? I'm so glad I'm not straight -- no accidental children in our house. (Of course the carefully-planned ones are just as much of a pain, but at least it's easier to limit the quantity.)

[JO]

I kind of hate you. And your wife. :) Not really. Just jealous. Glad you had a good vacation.

[Erika]

awww yeah, sukie, sukie.

[hazelblackberry]

Ooooh, verrrrrry saucy.

[Colleen]

now there's the sexy talk!

(fans self)